Information About Maria Margaretha Johanna van den Beemt

Basic information
Name: Maria Margaretha Johanna van den Beemt
Born: May 20, 1930 in Bergen op Zoom
Died: November 16, 2011 in Bergen op Zoom
Father (parent 1): Johannes Andreas (Jan) van den Beemt (m)
Mother (parent 2): Dominica Maria Elisabeth (Mien) Kramer (f)
Marriage / Relationship
Married: May 21, 1960 in 's-Gravenhage with Albert (Ab) Grivel (m) .
Children
- Eric Grivel (m) , born February 22, 1961 in 's-Gravenhage .
- T. Grivel (m) .
Memories
Memories are based on documents, family lore or personal experiences. They give more information about a person, but are not necessarilly complete or correct.
For photos: click on the photo for a larger format; email family@grivel.net for more information about the photo.
Childhood
Maria came from a large, catholic family. She was, as eleventh of twelve children (and the last girl), always the “baby” and not much was expected of her.
Her mother died before she was five years old, which shook her enormously. For the rest of her life she was convinced that her life would have been better if her mother had lived.
Maria’s father was a cigar manufacturer, originally from Dordrecht but in the 1920s he moved his factory to Bergen op Zoom. This factory went bankrupt in the 1930s, so contrary to her older siblings, Maria grew up in poverty in the relatively large house at the Noordzijde Zoom.
Wartime
House at the Noordzijde Zoom directly after the liberation of Bergen op Zoom: the house was heavily damaged, but a Dutch flag was flying.
The war, from 1940 until Bergen op Zoom was liberated in 1944, was a difficult time. There was never enough to eat, clothing and shoes came from donations, and the Catholic school was very strict. In spite of their poverty, though, her father was able to take in people in hiding.
Bergen op Zoom was on the route of the V-1 and V-2 rockets the Germans were aiming at London, and those rockets didn't always work that well. Sometimes they crashed shortly after take-off. One of them landed at the Zoom. The van den Beemt house was the first in the street not to suffer casualties. For the rest of her life, she hated fireworks as they brought back memories of this event.
The liberation of Bergen op Zoom by Canadian soldier ended up as a bad memory for Maria. She was a girl, fourteen and a half years old, and was raped by one of the soldiers. For the rest of her life she could never enjoy the liberation commemorations.
1945 to 1959
Maria in the ’50s
After elementary school Maria went to the Roman Catholic Industry School for Girls in Bergen op Zoom, with subjects like sewing of lingerie, fancy crafts, treatment of laundry, and domestic work. High school was not an option, partially because of the war, but also because not much was expected from girls.
After the war she lived with several of her siblings (her oldest sister was 20 years older than her), helping out with household chores and the children.
In the fifties she moved to The Hague, where she got a room in the Stevinstraat. She took courses in typing and shorthand at the Schoevers institute, and got a job with the attorney/tax consultant, mr. Udo.
1960 to 1985: Valkenboslaan
Wedding May 21, 1960
Through her nephew Arno she got to know Ab Grivel, whom she married in May 1960. She returned from her honeymoon pregnant and nine months later their first son Eric was born. Two and a half years later he was followed by the second son, Theo.
Maria originally resigned from her job when she married, but after a couple of years when the children were going to school, mr. Udo asked her to come back working for her. He had never been able to find a good successor to her, and was willing to adjust the work to her circumstances. So she only worked during school time, and a lot of it from her own house. If she had to go to the office, mr. Udo picked her up and dropped her off with his car. Sometimes, during vacations, one of the children could accompany her.
Maria and her family lived with her in-laws. Originally on the third floor of the large house at the Valkenboslaan, later after her father-in-law died on the second and third floor, with her mother-in-law on the first floor.
Living under the same roof with the mother-in-law caused a lot of friction. Her mother-in-law had a dominant personality and tried to interfere with raising the children. Maria never let her children see this frustration though, and later despite the tensions Maria helped her mother-in-law with cooking, bathing and more.
Mr. Udo retired by the end of the seventies and Maria looked for another part-time job. She was hired as administrative assistant with the publishing company of the Schoevers institute, the same institute where she was educated almost thirty years earlier.
As a child Maria never had the opportunity to do more than elementary school, which always left her with a feeling of inferiority. In 1980 she decided to do something about this, and signed up with the “mother MAVO,” a high school education program for adults. In the years that followed she worked through the course with excellent grades, being disappointed if she “only” got a B, and graduated in 1983.
1985 until 2001
Maria in Ede, 1999
Her husband Ab took early retirement and they move to Bergen op Zoom, where Maria was born, in 1985. The came to live in the Smitsstraat.
The move to Bergen op Zoom started a new chapter. They immediately connected with a group of neighbors, which gave them social connections they never had in The Hague. The connections with her family also flourished, with for instance a weekly coffee morning with her sister Theresia (“Trees” for short).
Once or twice a year Ab and Maria had an international vacation with such exotic destinations as Indonesia, India, Egypt, Kenya and South Africa. In-between their vacations they enjoyed their garden with the pond Ab dug (with help), the interactions with their neighbors, the sports club, and different restaurants where they would enjoy a cup of coffee in the morning.
In 1988 they moved to the Meilust service apartments, still in Bergen op zoom. Ab’s health deteriorated and they couldn’t do any big vacations anymore. Ab died in July 2001.
Alone
Visiting Eric and his family, 2004
After Ab’s death, Maria had to go on alone. She continued with the sports club, and with the bridge club in the Meilust. She picked up driving her car again, which she always left to her husband.
In the spring of 2002, 2004, 2006 and 2008 she visited her son Eric and his family in America. She enjoyed being spoiled, get good home-cooked food, and be with her grandsons. Although, after two weeks she also was happy to go back home and enjoy the quiet.
In 2010 Maria celebrated here 80th birthday with her children and grandchildren in a bungalow park in Lommel, Belgium. Her health deteriorated in 2011 to the point that the doctors decided (on her request) to only provide morphine. She died in her own apartment in November.
—Eric Grivel
Photo of the twelve children of Johannes Andreas van den Beemt and Dominica Elisabeth Maria Kramer, ca. 1938?
In the back: Hedda, Jan, Nicky, Leo, Gré, Stof. In front: Harry, Trees, Maria, Frans, Cees, Ben
—Eric Grivel
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